I want to fit in.

a plane seat (and buckled)
a roller coaster
the lecture hall seat in my class
skinny jeans
a cute short skirt (without leggings)
my Detroit shirt

Hungry

Well, it is day 3 of only liquids.  I am hungry.  I am day dreaming of a cheese pizza with bread sticks, and just think, a couple of says from now I won't even have hunger pangs like this.  I am excited for this journey and nervous.

I am nervous about throwing up, getting sick, feeling week, not being able to eat.  I am nervous about after surgery more than I am of the actual procedure.  Two days from now they will be cutting a portion of my stomach and placing it in a little garbage bag and pulling it out of my side.  Crazy thought.

I have had many people say that weigh loss surgery is the easy way out.  I am sorry to say that this is the hardest thing that I have had to do.  Between the requirements from my insurance company to the strict diet I have been following.  This is hard.  Not to mention that the journey has just begun.

I have a strict diet procedure for after surgery as well. Two weeks of nothing but liquids.  Two weeks of soft mushy foods, and one week of no red meat.  Plus the journey of exercise begins.  Who wants to have saggy loose skin hanging around after you lose weight.  Not me!

I am going to have to take the most medicine I have ever taken before.  I literally have a basket full of medication that I have to take before and after surgery.  CRAZY!!

Well, the journey has begun.  I am two days away from surgery.

warmed leftovers

     Once again, I have made my yearly goal to blog.  Yet again, it is almost the end of the year and I have posted only two.  Well, I have promised myself that this will soon change.  I have begun the long process of weight loss numerous times throughout my life and while I have had small successes, ultimately I have failed.
   "Failure is not an option", she said as I sat in my administrators office one afternoon.  Failure is not an option.  
    While I have prayed and researched and thought about weight loss surgery for years, I am finally making the decision.  My surgery is scheduled for December 17th and I will be undergoing the bariatric sleeve.  
   Is it the easy way out?  NO!
   This is the hardest thing I have ever done.  I have been dealing with doctors and scales, meetings, dietitians, strict diets and sugar free Jello.  This has not been the easy way out.  I am now waiting for my insurance's decision and I will know next month if all this has been worth it.  I will know if I am approved to have the surgery.  
   A friend of mine recently had this procedure and she has been telling me her journey and what to expect.  Yesterday, while we were discussing eating, she explained that she ordered a children's chicken and rice meal at the local Mexican restaurant and she warmed it up for leftovers the entire day.  One meal fed her for the entire day.  
   I wish that were the case for me right now.  While I am on a strict no carb diet from my doctor, all I can think about is ice cream!